Well, legally. Emotionally, I claimed the Elmer name the moment we put our hands in the air and walked back down the isle to "You're My Best Friend" by Queen.
But, today I legally applied for a new social security card and driver's license under the my new name: Amanda Nicole Elmer.
It's incredibly exciting! Finally, I am my husband's wife. His Mrs. Elmer. When we have a family, we will all share the same last name. (And, I'm really excited to start using the signature that I have been practicing for almost two years now.)
For some reason, however, I am feeling nostalgic, and attached to my maiden name. Don't get me wrong -- I changed my name on Facebook and Instagram to Amanda Elmer pretty much as soon as we got in the car to head to the hotel. I had been anticipating this change for such a long time! And I never thought I would hesitate.
As excited as I am, I suddenly feel like I am losing my identity. Being the oldest child in my family, I established the Dostert name. It was one that reflected passion, drive, dedication and compassion, and when people heard that name they knew that they would interact with a kind person who cared about the happiness of others.
Being a Dostert was unique -- to the point where almost no one could pronounce it correctly on their first go. I grew accustomed and even attached to my mispronounced name. While it is pronounced "Daw-stert", I was also "Doh-stert" and proud to be so. (In fact, I have fond memories of my now-husband-then-best-friend calling me that.)
The Dostert line is a line of hard-working and caring people. People who have struggled to overcome some of the hardest obstacles imaginable. People who laughed hard and loved even harder, and people who made large personal sacrifices for the joy of others.
Most importantly, though, Dostert's are family people. With a history of large families within the line, it's no wonder why I identify so well with my ancestors and relatives. As the oldest of seven, I grew up with family as my number one priority. And this instilled in me the desire to have a big, close-knit family myself.
I have to realize that while I may no longer be a Dostert on paper, I will forever be one in my heart. I will still be my parents' daughter and siblings' sister.
The girl everyone knew to be loving and compassionate, hardworking and bold. I will still be myself.
I can take these cherished values and traits and turn my little Elmer family into one I can be proud to have. One I can be happy to identify with. I can make the already incredible Elmer name an even better one, with all of those attributes that I hold dear.
Changing my name makes me so excited to start a family and raise my little Elmer children to be as loving as their mom and as confident and funny as their dad; To graduate college as Amanda Elmer and establish a name for myself in my field; To teach as Mrs. Elmer; to maybe even start a couple businesses with my husband as the Elmer's.
Despite my momentary hesitation, my future as an Elmer is bright, I can tell.
