First, the initial cleaning commences. We sort through stacks of mail, file paperwork that we need, and recycle the items we don't. We donate or sell the clothes and other materials that we don't need anymore. We organize and label boxes, and fill them to the brim.
Then we pack everything up; the bookshelves, the extra sheets and pillows. We take all of the decorations off the wall, and wrap all the picture frames.
Once everything is packed, we throw all the little items (you know, that junk drawer in your kitchen?) in a bag or a box, and we clean again.
But in between all those steps, we find lost memories. It's almost as if our memories hide behind our possessions, and when we least expect it, they creep up on us. We can feel their presence, almost.
I found a letter from a close friend from high school in my bookshelf, and when I opened it, I was overwhelmed by the nostalgia I felt. I could remember where I was the first time I read it, and I could almost smell my past surroundings. And, when I read it again, I felt the same way I remember feeling when it was given to me.
And that memory, triggered other memories, wonderful moments that I had not thought about for a long time. And those thoughts brought on a slate of emotion - they reminded me of a person who I used to be so close to, but no longer really communicate with. This person was my best friend for a long time. We worked side by side, helped each other through a lot of struggle, and in the meantime, made a lot of memories with each other.
And, while finding that letter may have been particularly impacting to me, it was one of many items that released a happy memory that day.
I have a bouquet of dried roses hanging on my wall, and when I smell them, I am taken back to my twentieth birthday, when Tim took me and some friends to the Melting Pot and had them waiting for me at the table. Isn't it incredible how you can smell something, and it instantly fills your heart with warmth and reminds you of something? This happens to me everyday! I can be at work, and someone's lotion reminds me of an old friend, or the smell of popcorn brings up memories of a trip I took with my family.
I was throwing out old shoes, and I found a pair of shoes (zebra patterned flats that I loved) that Tim bought me, just because. Another pair, I wore when I gave my ASB election speech. As I was writing that last sentence, I found a shirt that I made with a friend for another friends graduation. I remember going over to Liz's house and enjoying the summer weather while we were waiting for the puff paint to dry.
I think that's why moving, while it is a nuisance, is refreshing. We take the time to clean and pack and clean some more, and stumble upon things that bring us back to the real world, and realign our minds.
So, I've got a really empty apartment, but my heart is full of memories that I had long forgotten about.
So, I am moving forward, but I am humbled by memories of where I came from.
So, I have a lot of labor ahead of me, but while I move, I am making more memories that I can re-discover at a later time.
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