Subtle Things & Helping Things Grow

I found my life's purpose today. 

I wasn't searching or looking or probing my day to day life to figure this out. It came to me suddenly and subtly when I was out running errands with my fiance.

We were visiting with my mom, and I was out admiring her garden. I was there for 30 minutes, and I left with  a tomato plant, a vase full of beautiful purple and blue hydrangeas, and some lavender, all up rooted and picked from her garden.

I rushed home and gave the plants some water, and re-potted the tomato plant, and all the while Tim was smiling at me. I asked him why, and he said,

"I love that these little things make you so happy."

And, I realized that these little things are what I was put on this earth to experience. Not gardening, per say. But nurturing little things, and helping them grow into big things. Gardening is just a physical manifestation of my desire to help things, people, and ideas thrive. And, honestly, I owe this all to my mother.


My mother has always been my best friend, but ever since the start, my mother has taught me to nurture; to believe in things and find faith in things. I was raised to encourage, not to put down, and that all things need time to mature. But, most importantly, I was taught that love should grow and multiply, for family especially, but in all areas of life. 


It is thanks to her that I have found my life passion in education and the development of children. Because of her, I want a big family as full of love as the one I have right now. She has instilled in me that proper way to nurture one's own body. Her lessons have taught me that all things come to those who spend time earning it. My hobbies and ideals reflect that: teaching, dancing, gardening, writing, my new-found discovery on the importance of a healthy lifestyle, my soon to be marriage, my beliefs regarding family. All of these things take time, patience, faith and love to help them grow. 


And, that is why I believe I am here -- to nurture, to develop, to love with all my heart, and to help things grow. 

Subtle Things & Forgotten Beauty

Today is beautiful. Everything about today is beautiful.
It is so easy to be caught up in the stresses of life, and forget about the world around us; the natural, fresh beauty of our surroundings. It is a lovely sixty degrees outside, perfect weather to walk with my mother in, like I have already done this morning. It is the perfect temperature to sit on the couch with the doors and windows open, a blanket, and a good book, or paper and a pen. The loyal hummingbird who faithfully perches on the branch of a tree outside my patio every morning does not stray from it's routine. My cats are running through my apartment and playing with each other. My loving fiance accidentally butt-dialed me at work, so I got to hear his sweet voice before he hung up. I not only have a wonderful family, but also a soon to be set of in-laws that care so deeply about our well being. I am a lucky, lucky woman. And, I often forget that.

My life is a jumbled mess of necessity and preparation: school, work, wedding planning, bill paying, health management and several other preparations for my future often get in the way of acknowledging what is around me. I have always been someone who quickly grows impatient with being stagnant. I find enjoyment in improvement, happiness in growth, and staying in one place or position for too long encourages my frustration. Thus, my current life situation is not my ideal situation. I am so eager to be done with school, to get a new job doing what I enjoy, to have lost the weight, to marry my best friend and to start our family together, that I ignore the beauty in my life already.

I have a secure job, with room for growth and promotion, and benefits. I am a student, with ample time and freedom to decide where I want to get whatever degree I want to get in whatever field. I live with my best friend and the love of my life, and the gorgeous ring on my finger reminds me everyday how lucky I am. My mother loves me so much that she is willing to work by my side to help me get healthy. My sister and little brothers run to the door when they anticipate my arrival. I have food in my fridge and pantry. Lucky woman, indeed.

I have had the morning the myself, and for once, I feel rejuvenated. After walking in the sun with my mother and a little me-time, I feel refreshed and motivated. Here is to living in the moment!